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Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Ourselves    by Melody Beattie Amazon.com order for
Codependent No More
by Melody Beattie
Order:  USA  Can
Hazelden, 1992 (1986)
Hardcover, Softcover, Paperback, Audio, CD

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* *   Reviewed by Mary Ann Smyth

Agnes Repplier said: 'It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.'

How can someone find happiness in their own life when they are too busy trying to control someone else's? In the case of addictions alcoholism, drug use, overeating to name a few having the addict change their ways is not something anyone can make happen for them. Trying to change them only creates stress and unhappiness for those trying to help.

Codependent No More is a no-nonsense guide to helping yourself to a happier, less stressfull life. Author Melody Beattie doesn't place blame anywhere. She simply - and in easy to understand terms - attempts to relieve the codependent of what he/she considers their duty to render aid to the addicted.

To Beattie's way of thinking, codependency helps no one. Guilt and anger raise their ugly heads, often repressed because of the forgiveness that is constantly being offered. The author advises getting off that guilt trip, releasing that anger, and finding inner peace. She also outlines how to do this.

This is a worthwhile book, recommended to someone I know who has a daughter with problems. It has made their home life so much more relaxed. It has not solved the problem. That will take years, if ever. But now the whole family can co-exist more comfortably, rather than as warring factions.

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