For Parents Only: Getting Inside the Head of Your Kid
Shaunti Feldhahn & Lisa Rice
Multnomah, 2007 (2007)
Read an Excerpt
Reviewed by Melissa Parcel
haunti Feldhahn, author of the bestselling
For Women Only: What You Need to Know About the Inner Lives of Men
, researches her subjects and analyzes the data in order to better understand her topics. In this latest book, she talked to children, primarily teens and preteens, about what was going on inside of them.
he authors came up with six interesting findings, based on a conflict between what we as parents think is happening versus what is really happening in the lives of children as they are growing up. They cover peer pressure, rejection of parents and values, rules and discipline, kids' views of parents' opinions and criticism, listening, and negative attitudes. For example, '
Kids say parents don't listen
' is what parents think is happening. What the authors say is really happening is that '
Kids tend to stop talking because they perceive parents as rotten listeners but will open up when we prove we're safe and calmly acknowledge their feelings before addressing a problem.
ach of the six main findings has its own chapter, where facts about each subject are presented. Then the next section walks parents through practical applications about what they can do in order to heal this disconnect between parents and children. Throughout the book, factual research, charts, graphs, and survey data provide more than just anecdotal evidence to support the authors' claims.
or Parents Only: Getting Inside the Head of Your Kid
is an informative goldmine packed into a tiny package. Although the book is particularly geared toward issues that affect parents of preteens and teens, it would be helpful to read it for any age. The information can provide parents with a blueprint for how to approach those years, no matter what age their children are now.
lthough the book contains some spiritual content, it isn't overtly religious and the values presented will ring true with every reader. If parents are seeking to know just what might be going through their child's head, this is an invaluable resource. The actual thoughts and feelings of young people are presented in a way that adults can ponder, and through them discover how to approach their children. If you have ever wondered, '
What is my child thinking?
For Parents Only
can help you to open up the lines of communication and create a happier, healthier, and more stable relationship.
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